2551.First, almost as a self-abnegating reflex, is a dislclaimer. This is not, though it may appear, one of those self-absorbed "sorry I haven't been posting for a while" posts, because there is nothing so amazingly arrogant - to me - than a post apologizing for not posting to a blog that hardly anybody reads.
If this chronicle has become anything, though, it's kind of become a laboratory for my mind. I try to straight-jacket it into the, as it turns out, very fuzzy rubric of graphic design.
I am still trying to find steady work in graphic design, for what that's worth. Anybody who's been impressed by my verbiage, I do layout, can use Quark XPress and InDesign, Photoshop and Illustrator, and Dreamweaver; can write, and edit. Just sayin'. If you know any leads, do a brother a favor, thus-and-such, et-cet-er-AH.
The flat of it is, that I enjoy just the act of writing so very much that I really can't stop, and I guess I find this as performance art that I just can't quit doing. So, 20 days ago, more by accident than design, I stopped posting. And I'm looking at myself looking at what I've done, and letting everyone else see too, because, like I said, it's performance art, even for me.
Sometimes, you don't have a lot to say. I think the world would be a better place, or at least a not-so-worse place, if we didn't feel we had to share everything with everyone all the time. So, for a few days, I turned off the flow.
My refuge became my dead-tree diary, and I would read and record my experiences into my environment. It's hard to explain cogently, and sounds kind of corny, but sometimes I've felt, for the past few weeks, that I've taken everything in and projected it out into the world around me, and now I'm reading the echoes - like some sort of intellectual sonar.
I've gotten some interesting ideas out of it … I found some ideas flipped inside-out, and inverted, but not in that melodramatic way you sometimes hear of. There's no eureka! or ZOMG! moments.
So this gets projected into the aether, and I don't know how it will ping on back, but it will.
This was designed to make no sense ... but only after the fact.
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