2856.Where is Jon Hiner? doesn't have the same rhetorical intrigue that Who is John Galt? does, but if you're are Portlander of at least 10 years standing, you've probably wondered once or twice.
After all, the Hiner divorce was a thing of legend, though mostly kept on the Q-T. Back in the early Oughties, the local chain Mattress World became an advertising mainstay, it's jingle catchily reminding us that It's not too late to sleep like a baby. Then, in about '07, Jon and Sheri Hiner, both beaming up unto then in their goofy little commercials, split. Jon suddenly disappeared from the commercials.
You could still sleep like a baby, but Jon would have to do that somewhere else, it developed; he and the wife had split the sheets. And Jon appeared to sink into obscurity (though, latterly we find that that's because of a little non-compete clause in the couple's divorce) while Sheri steered the ship with notable success until she foundered on the State of Washington's sales-tax shoals.
While suffering a bout of insomnia I happened to see … much to my surprise … Jon Hiner! Selling beds! From his single location! Which looks (via Google Street View) like this these days:
After all, the Hiner divorce was a thing of legend, though mostly kept on the Q-T. Back in the early Oughties, the local chain Mattress World became an advertising mainstay, it's jingle catchily reminding us that It's not too late to sleep like a baby. Then, in about '07, Jon and Sheri Hiner, both beaming up unto then in their goofy little commercials, split. Jon suddenly disappeared from the commercials.
You could still sleep like a baby, but Jon would have to do that somewhere else, it developed; he and the wife had split the sheets. And Jon appeared to sink into obscurity (though, latterly we find that that's because of a little non-compete clause in the couple's divorce) while Sheri steered the ship with notable success until she foundered on the State of Washington's sales-tax shoals.
Locals to the area (and habitués to the area like The Wife™ and myself) have seen several businesses use this space over the past decade or so. There was once a branch of the late, lamented Schuck's Auto Supply there; it was at one time a Parker Paint store.
And now, it's where Jon Hiner has, since 2010 it turns out (he has kept a quiet profile!), established his beachhead in the inexplicably, bizarrely-vigorous greater Portland bed market. Of course, with Sheri back in the game at the rebooted Mattress World, now under different management as Mattress World Northwest, I'm guessing we can all go back to sleeping like a baby.
If you want to hear Jon's word about it here you go: http://whereisjonhiner.com, which might have more information than you counted on hearing about the Hiner-Hiner split.
Sleep World is at http://sleepworld.cc, if you really need a mattress badly enough that you'll go straight there from a slightly-read blog to get one.
No comments:
Post a Comment