904. So we, invested as we were in the playout of the 2007 edition of Hell's Kitchen, and committed Gordon Ramsay fans as we were, sat down to watch the ultimate episode; down to Bonnie and Rock.
I don't think anybody's followed my comments on the show but if they had they'd have seen a marked and obvious decrease in my passion for reporting on it. This is not a mistake. After noticing that my writing about it obviously wasn't really engaging anyone (I'm not doing self-pity here–when a lot of zero-second hits generate no comments or links whatsoever, you can only draw one conclusion), I also noticed something other commenters noticed about the contestants–they weren't really worth getting excited about.
And to be fair, maybe that wasn't thier fault. After all, the first winner we followed from the post to the finish line was Heather West–and she was amazing last year, really inspiring. Our winner this year–Rock–was someone we couldn't get behind no matter how hard we tried. His quirks were scary, his outbursts were scary...sure, he was the most consistent contestant overall, but he was about as lovable as an automobile transmission.
Bonnie, on the other hand, was a late bloomer: she was wishy-washy and whining about how she wasn't good enough through most of the show. Then, when she finally got her gumption, it was amazing to watch...and way too late.
So they went down to the final challenge, Bonnie with her "Neighborhood Hideaway" and Rock with his "Cajun Bistro". Both had scrumptious looking food. Both had thier problems (but I swear, Julia, who had won us over with her spunk, lost us with her endless crying, complaining, and trying to undermine Bonnie). At the end, the doors opened, and Rock stepped through–and Bonne was the epitome of the good sport, and it appeared genuine.
But at the end, after the credits rolled, The Wife™ turned to me and said something very telling:
"There was nobody to get passionate about, was there?"
No, hon, there wasn't. And that, my friends, is the lesson of Hell's Ktichen 2007.
And an intersting footnote to this season: In this article posted on TV Squad several weeks ago, it looked like the winner had indeed been leaked: word got out that it was Rock. This suspended all betting on bodog.com.