29 October 2008

I Am ALL Oregon, Baby, V 1.01

1836.


Oregon State SealNota Bene: This list was originally composed back in 2007, when I found myself looking over a quiz and probably realized it came up a little short. The subject was How Oregon Are You?, and it was a cute quiz but I must have thought it missed the mark a bit ... so I came up with a list of my own, based on the fact that I was born here and while still young (and remarkably good looking), have, because of my unquenchable adoration for my home  (and my thrill at being fortunate enough to be able to calll myself native Oregonian) seen an awuful lot of modern Oregon history


From being born in Silverton to the Urban Growth Boundaries to the Ocean Beaches, from the Cascades to the Coast with occasional trips to Grass Pants Grants Pass, Terrebonne, and Pendleton, to the Rajneeshees and the Bottle Bill, I've seen an awful lot of Oregon. I know, instinctively, the correct pronounciation of the word Willamette, and how to properly school someone in saying it right. And while I might not be the quinessential Oregonian, I think I come pretty damn close.


There is a je ne sais quoi (no, I'm not making that joke) to being in Oregon. You can be in a beautiful evergreen grove, in majestic mountains, somewhere else ... and you just know it's not Oregon. It comes from the ground, somehow. It's a subliminal sense, a sense of terrior, if nothing else. There's just something right.


Anyhow! I recieved in the email another item to put in the list (H/T to you, Glenn Dettweiler) and it made me look on the list again, and in the interest of keeping it current, adding it to the list (it's #72, at the end). So, in the interests of being up-to-date and all, here's I am ALL Oregon, Baby, V 1.01.


Enjoy:



Welcome readers from UtterlyBoring, over in Bend. Feel free to comment–or if you have a question, ask away (and thanks for the tip).

861. It has not escaped my notice that a little quiz has been bopping about the blogging-o-sphere locally. The subject: How Oregon Are You?

Usually I shun taking such quizzes. Occasionally they are a little fun, but in the end they are typically based on someone else's perception of something we think we have in common but actually really don't–or at least, understand just differently enough that even though we all think we're on the same page, we actually aren't, or we're just using slightly different versions of the same alphabet.

Anyway, I'm not really trying to trash this quiz (especially in view of the tragic fate of the author...please, everyone, a moment of silence and then make the proper donation if you are so moved and can so afford), especially since it made a lot of people smile (me included) and was just made out for fun. It did make me think about what made "an Oregonian".

Especially in view of the fact that, despite the fact I was born in Oregon (Silverton, as I've before said), after two tries the best I could do was 88% (what did I get wrong, I wonder). Regardless, I do have an Oregon birth certificate, and that trumps all.

There are also "Oregonians" that I never "got". Gerry Frank, for instance. He's seems typically to be regarded as the quintessential Oregonian, even borrowing the name of a cherished Portland retail memory (M&F's "Friday Surprise") for his Oregonian column, but I can guaran-dang-tee you he never even soujourned for even a moment on my side of the tracks. I don't care who his family is; I just can't buy the idea of a fellow whose most signature literary achievement is the renowned How to Buy It, Find It, Eat It in...New York.

Yeah, I know...Meier & Frank heir, chief-of-staff to Mark Hatfield, and all that, but what he decidedly ain't is Oregonian Just Like Me™, and hardly the quentessential Oregonian. What business does an Oregon homie have getting to be an expert on the Big Smoke anyway? I mean, in those Pace picante sauce commericals, weren't the words "New York City" followed perforce by the phrase "Get a Rope"?

Okay, enough ranting. My point (and I do have one) is that there are many things that can qualify one as having that certain Oregonian something. Having grown up as a native-born (there are only fifteen of us: identify us for cool prizes!) there are a variety of things that I think you should be aware of and conversant on to be really Oregonian in my book. Since I have appointed myself arbiter, herewith, the list (not necessarily complete). You could really be an Oregonian if:



  1. You remember who Gene Brendler is.

  2. You watched Ramblin' Rod, no matter what age you are

  3. You or some family member appeared on Ramblin' Rod, no matter what age you are.

  4. You inveigled your parent(s) to buy Pop Shoppe pop because you saw it on Rambin' Rod.

  5. You know what Ramblin' Rod and Lars Larson have in common.

  6. You can name which TV stations the following personalities anchored for: Richard Ross, Pete Schulberg, Ivan Smith, Kathy Smith (no apparent relation), Bill Lagatutta, Bill O'Reilly (yes, that Bill O'Reilly), Robin Chapman, Tom McCall, Fred Jenkins, Rod Luck, Jim Bosley, Rick Meyers (no relation to Fred Meyer. Speaking of which...).

  7. You know what Fred G. Meyer's middle initial stood for.

  8. You knew that Freddy's was where you found things were "My-te-Fine".

  9. You remember than Fred Meyer once had a store on SW Morrison St in Downtown Portland.

  10. You understand why all Fred Meyer ads that aired during that time seemed to indicated that virtually nothing Fred Meyer advertised was sold at that Morrison Street Store

  11. You remember how the building that housed that Morrison Street store was levelled (this doesn't happen often in Oregon)

  12. You remember what sort of imported car Tom McCall stuffed his 6-foot-plus frame into during his tenure as Governor.

  13. You consider Tom McCall God. There's no passes on this one.

  14. You remember what Tom McCall did to make the beaches of Oregon open to everyone, all the time.
    You know that, in Oregon, signs that said "Ocean Beaches" was just Oregonian for "This way to the coast".

  15. You understand that the correct way to say Glisan is seen as incorrect, and the incorrect pronounciation is what everyone uses.

  16. You have spent at least one (preferably more) camping holidays at Detroit Lake (or similar reservoirs in the Cascades.

  17. You remember when Bend had a population of about 15,000. Wasn't all that long ago.

  18. You know what they Round-Up in Pendleton each year.

  19. You have eaten frozen food products by Ore-Ida.

  20. You have had earnest discussions with someone east of the Cascades about what Oregon really is.

  21. You have visited Silver Falls State Park at least once.South Falls of Silver Creek

  22. You have ridden a Cherriot...or know what one is.

  23. You know which Oregon town the "Cherry City" is...and why they call it that.

  24. You have watched at least one go of the Jerry Lewis Telethon on KPTV.

  25. You know what Vortex was (I'm not talking about the one down in SW Oregon).

  26. You know what the 80's one-hit-wonders Quarterflash was before they were Quarterflash.

  27. You know what the founders of Quarterflash went on to.

  28. You know where Mark Hatfield kicked off each election campaign (or maybe that was Packwood).

  29. You remember why "Trooper" Dick Curtis wanted to know where those two truckers were going with all that beer.

  30. You remember his extremely short-lived daytime talkshow on KOIN-TV.

  31. You remember where the Portland Sports Arena was. Bonus if you know what it was before it was that.

  32. You know who Frank Bonnema was.

  33. For that matter, you know who Victor Ives and Jimmy Hollister were, which radio station they worked for, which TV station they did a show for (and the characters thereon), and what style of comedy they did.

  34. You ever ate "jo-jos" bought in a roadside convenience store.

  35. You know there really is (was? what's become of her?) an Izzy's behind Izzy's Pizza and where Izzy's began.

  36. You have a Bi-Mart Membership card (I still have my original green paper card from 1981) (It's Okay, I don't know what the 7734 is up with that name, either. But it IS a nice place to shop).

  37. You vistied OMSI while it was still in Washington Park (and still affordable).

  38. You saw a Tom Peterson's "Wake Up" commercial after midnight. Bonus here if you went down to Tom Peterson's in the middle of the night just to see if they weren't fooling about being open that late. Whether or not you were drunk when you did it doesn't matter, but it does make for an interesting story.

  39. If you ever noticed that the Humane Society seems to be out near the airport...of course, that might just be me.

  40. You remember what the shows "Evening" and "PM Magazine" were about.

  41. You cringe whenever you hear someone going on, once again, about that damned exploding whale. Bonus points grudgingly awarded if you know who broke that story.

  42. You don't get bonus points if you know where the fellow who broke the story in number 38 works now, but I will say he has a fine morning radio show. You should listen.

  43. You know what KPOJ was during the 70s and 80s, when it was huge.

  44. You know where the call-sign KPOJ came from, and what the letters (except the K) stood for.

  45. You are aware of Mill-Ends Park, and why it became what it is today.

  46. You know what was in Tom McCall Waterfront Park before it was a park.

  47. You know the elevation of Mount Hood within 100 feet without consulting a reference book.

  48. You remember when the Willamette ferries were for free.

  49. You know how to get to the Wheatland, Canby, and Buena Vista ferries without consulting a Thomas Guide.

  50. You ever had (or saw) a bumper-sticker that read "The Wheatland Ferry Does It For Free"

  51. You remember Yamhill County back when all they had out there was McMinnville.Oregon State Capitol, by Samuel John Klein

  52. You remember that McMinnville's annual city fete is called "Turkey-rama".

  53. You remember when Western Oregon University was called "Oregon College of Education".

  54. You remember that OCE's campus paper was once called The Lamron...and why.

  55. You know the back way from Independence to Corvallis (actually, that is just me...I highly recommend it. It's pretty!).

  56. You know what the huge blockhouse of Highway 99W at Adair Village (just north of Corvallis) used to contain.

  57. You remember how scandalous it was to have a case of Coors, and why you couldn't get it here.

  58. You remember how disappointed you were at finally tasting Coors, and thinking you'd of been better off with a six-pack of Blitz-Weinhard.

  59. You remember that Blitz-Weinhard was once "the beer here".

  60. You know what I mean when I say "Mossback" (hint-this list is highly mossback-centric).

  61. You're thankful that hops are once again plentiful along the state highways.

  62. You miss the smell of beer brewing next when you go to Powells.

  63. The words "Harbor Drive" mean anything to you.

  64. You ever said "Don't Californicate Oregon".

  65. You're sure that you'd love the Oregon Shakespearean Festival, if you'd ever get round to going.

  66. You've heard of "Drain, Oregon", and that's just fine. No need to actually visit (no hatin' on Drain, by the way).

  67. You know what and where the "D" River is, and think those kids up in Great Falls MT are just a teensy bit uppity. And wrong.

  68. When you go to Newport, whether or not you can visit the Oregon Coast Aquarium, you make sure you stop by the OSU Marine Science Center.

  69. You aren't as impressed by the various bouts of the "town" of Brothers being sold as the outside world is.You, every now and then, use Highway 99E to get to Salem, rather than I-5. Also a pretty drive.

  70. You know the correct pronunciation of "Gervais"

  71. You know the difference between "Eola" and "Ecola".

  72. You remember when smelt were caught by the bag full every summer.


Wow. I didn't know I'd come up with such a big list.


Now you know what I mean when I say I think this is more than a little subjective. To me, however, the definition of an Oregonian would be someone, no matter where, they're from, that cherishes the special character of Oregon-no matter how you see it-and commits themselves, just like many of us do, to see that Oregon endures and Oregon, and not just some other place in the world.


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3 comments:

stan said...

Ok, here we go....

1. You remember who Gene Brendler is.

Before my time (BMT), evidently.

2. You watched Ramblin' Rod, no matter what age you are
Yes

3. You or some family member appeared on Ramblin' Rod, no matter what age you are.

No, but I always wanted to. It was such a status symbol – extra cool points if you won the smiles contest.

4. You inveigled your parent(s) to buy Pop Shoppe pop because you saw it on Rambin' Rod.

Oh, yes. And it was good!
5. You know what Ramblin' Rod and Lars Larson have in common.

KPTV? Anchors on KPTV? Was Rod Anders an anchor?

6. You can name which TV stations the following personalities anchored for: Richard Ross, Pete Schulberg, Ivan Smith, Kathy Smith (no apparent relation), Bill Lagatutta, Bill O'Reilly (yes, that Bill O'Reilly), Robin Chapman, Tom McCall, Fred Jenkins, Rod Luck, Jim Bosley, Rick Meyers (no relation to Fred Meyer. Speaking of which...).

KATU, KGW, ?, KGW, ?, KATU (I read it on the Wiki a long time ago), ?, KGW?, ?, ?, KATU, ?

7. You know what Fred G. Meyer's middle initial stood for.

I used to know, but I forgot. Gilooly?

8. You knew that Freddy's was where you found things were "My-te-Fine".

Yes, and who can forget the short-lived President’s Choice?

9. You remember than Fred Meyer once had a store on SW Morrison St in Downtown Portland.

I vaguely remember that as a kid. My parents didn’t like to go downtown, so I rarely went. Didn’t it turn into a Payless, then a RiteAid?

10. You understand why all Fred Meyer ads that aired during that time seemed to indicated that virtually nothing Fred Meyer advertised was sold at that Morrison Street Store

I do remember that, though. I used to have such pity for the poor Morrison store. Apparently all they sold was month-old dryer lint.

11. You remember how the building that housed that Morrison Street store was levelled (this doesn't happen often in Oregon)

No, I don’t think I remember that one, unless it was the building that made way for Pioneer Square, in which case I recall it being called the Corbett Building, and we watched it live when I was in school. Also, this would answer my question in #9.

12. You remember what sort of imported car Tom McCall stuffed his 6-foot-plus frame into during his tenure as Governor.
BMT.

13. You consider Tom McCall God. There's no passes on this one.

Again, BMT. Pretty much everything McCall-related is BMT for me. I sort of remember him being guv when I was a child, but I was way more into Legos and Matchbox cars than local politics. I consider God God :)

14. You remember what Tom McCall did to make the beaches of Oregon open to everyone, all the time. You know that, in Oregon, signs that said "Ocean Beaches" was just Oregonian for "This way to the coast".

See #13.

15. You understand that the correct way to say Glisan is seen as incorrect, and the incorrect pronounciation is what everyone uses.

GLISS-un. I remember that much. But one can argue that since almost everyone pronounces it GLEE-sun (which sounds happier, dudnit?) that it is indeed correct. After all, “color” was spelled “colour” until someone decided to drop the British U for efficiency’s sake. Now that 99.9% of America spells it “color” (except for a few nose-upturned Anglophilic purists), it’s correct. So, GLEE-sun.

16. You have spent at least one (preferably more) camping holidays at Detroit Lake (or similar reservoirs in the Cascades.

Kingfisher Campground, on the Calawash River in the MHNF was our usual spot.

17. You remember when Bend had a population of about 15,000. Wasn't all that long ago.

Before the Californication? Yep.

18. You know what they Round-Up in Pendleton each year.

It ain’t tough carpet stains, that’s for sure.Yee-haw!

19. You have eaten frozen food products by Ore-Ida.

Yes, yes, yes. Although they actually sell ’em here in little old Carthage, too. They also sell Flav-R-Pac, though it's called West-Pac here.

20. You have had earnest discussions with someone east of the Cascades about what Oregon really is.

Yes, and they thought we all rode horses. Which is not true. We all upgraded to Subarus in the mid-80’s.

21. You have visited Silver Falls State Park at least once.

Yes, and admired the Homer Davenport murals in Silverton along the way.

22. You have ridden a Cherriot...or know what one is.
Never ridden one, but I know that it’s Salem’s bus system.
23. You know which Oregon town the "Cherry City" is...and why they call it that.

Salem, but I don’t remember why.

24. You have watched at least one go of the Jerry Lewis Telethon on KPTV.

Yes, yes I have. Let’s look at the board!

25. You know what Vortex was (I'm not talking about the one down in SW Oregon).

Short-lived nightclub in the gay triangle? Or are you referring to an early name for the Rose Garden Arena?

26. You know what the 80's one-hit-wonders Quarterflash was before they were Quarterflash.

A little bit BMT, but my dad worked with Rindy Ross’s father right around the time that “Harden My Heart” became a hit. I also remember that they would take Polaroids of their audiences, kind of like getting autographs in reverse. Nifty concept.

27. You know what the founders of Quarterflash went on to.
Amway?

28. You know where Mark Hatfield kicked off each election campaign (or maybe that was Packwood).

Benson Hotel?

29. You remember why "Trooper" Dick Curtis wanted to know where those two truckers were going with all that beer.

Nope. Must be BMT, or I wasn’t paying attention.

30. You remember his extremely short-lived daytime talkshow on KOIN-TV.

See #29.

31. You remember where the Portland Sports Arena was. Bonus if you know what it was before it was that.

Was that the old Vaughn Street baseball park?

32. You know who Frank Bonnema was.

See #29.

33. For that matter, you know who Victor Ives and Jimmy Hollister were, which radio station they worked for, which TV station they did a show for (and the characters thereon), and what style of comedy they did.

I sort of remember Victor Ives. Didn’t he jock/talk at, help me here, KKEY, which was in a wedge building right on Burnside? Jimmy Hollister, I don’t remember. The TV show, I definitely don’t remember.

34. You ever ate "jo-jos" bought in a roadside convenience store.

My wife looks at me funny when I call them jo-jos. I thought that’s what they were called everywhere!

35. You know there really is (was? what's become of her?) an Izzy's behind Izzy's Pizza and where Izzy's began.

I don’t know where it began. Funny that there’s another Izzy’s behind it. I don’t know if she still does this, but I remember when a group of us would goto the Gateway Izzy’s after church about once a month in the late-90’s, and we would see her walking around and talking to the customers. Apparently that’s what she did all the time, going from one branch to another, gathering customer feedback in person. A very sweet lady who really cared. I don’t know if she does that anymore.

36. You have a Bi-Mart Membership card (I still have my original green paper card from 1981) (It's Okay, I don't know what the 7734 is up with that name, either. But it IS a nice place to shop).

I had a green Bi-Mart card in the mid-90’s. I always thought it was a bit weird that they used a member’s driver license number as the membership number, especially since they’d display the numbers in full view on Lucky Number Tuesdays. I understand they’ve finally changed that policy.

37. You visited OMSI while it was still in Washington Park (and still affordable).

Oh yes, it was a field tripper’s dream – the OMSI + WP Zoo + Forestry Center trifecta!

38. You saw a Tom Peterson's "Wake Up" commercial after midnight. Bonus here if you went down to Tom Peterson's in the middle of the night just to see if they weren't fooling about being open that late. Whether or not you were drunk when you did it doesn't matter, but it does make for an interesting story.

Wake up! Wake up! Stop watching Portland Wrestling for a minute and listen to me!

39. If you ever noticed that the Humane Society seems to be out near the airport...of course, that might just be me.

It was very near the Army Recruiting Center, too. Odd juxtaposition.

40. You remember what the shows "Evening" and "PM Magazine" were about.

"PM Magazine", hosted by Teresa Richardson. I’m surprised you didn’t mention “Faces and Places”, too. Or “Northwest Reports”. Or what about “On the Spot”, hosted by Tracy Barry’s husband Larry Blackmar? Pwned! :) Except I don't remember "Evening".

41. You cringe whenever you hear someone going on, once again, about that damned exploding whale. Bonus points grudgingly awarded if you know who broke that story.

Every. Single. Year. Since. 1979. Paul Linnman.

42. You don't get bonus points if you know where the fellow who broke the story in number 38 works now, but I will say he has a fine morning radio show. You should listen.

KEX, yo.

43. You know what KPOJ was during the 70s and 80s, when it was huge.

KGW-AM 620, aka “62 KGW” (Cooper font on the round sticker, come on, that’s worth 10,000 bonus points), "Craig Walker in the Morning".

44. You know where the call-sign KPOJ came from, and what the letters (except the K) stood for.

Nope. Take away 250 bonus points from #43.

45. You are aware of Mill-Ends Park, and why it became what it is today.

Smallest municipal park in the world, but I don’t remember why it got its name, though.

46. You know what was in Tom McCall Waterfront Park before it was a park.

I-5, baby.

47. You know the elevation of Mount Hood within 100 feet without consulting a reference book.

11,287 feet.

48. You remember when the Willamette ferries were for free.
I don’t remember the Willamette ferries.

49. You know how to get to the Wheatland, Canby, and Buena Vista ferries without consulting a Thomas Guide.

Wheatland no, Canby yes, Buena Vista no.

50. You ever had (or saw) a bumper-sticker that read "The Wheatland Ferry Does It For Free"

Nope.

51. You remember Yamhill County back when all they had out there was McMinnville.

You mean there's more now?

52. You remember that McMinnville's annual city fete is called "Turkey-rama".

Nope. Not familiar with McMinnville at all. Always bypassed it on the way to Lincoln City.

53. You remember when Western Oregon University was called "Oregon College of Education".

Maybe BMT. Not sure.

54. You remember that OCE's campus paper was once called The Lamron...and why.

No idea.

55. You know the back way from Independence to Corvallis (actually, that is just me...I highly recommend it. It's pretty!).

I know I’ve done it a couple of times. Also, Monmouth is a pretty town.

56. You know what the huge blockhouse of Highway 99W at Adair Village (just north of Corvallis) used to contain.

Amway? Month-old dryer lint?

57. You remember how scandalous it was to have a case of Coors, and why you couldn't get it here.

BMT, but I’ve heard the stories. No, that’s not true, I just watched Smokey and the Bandit. several times.

58. You remember how disappointed you were at finally tasting Coors, and thinking you'd of been better off with a six-pack of Blitz-Weinhard.

I never tried either. I started on the micros, and never downgraded.

59. You remember that Blitz-Weinhard was once "the beer here".

Yes, I do remember that.

60. You know what I mean when I say "Mossback" (hint-this list is highly mossback-centric).

Oh, no! I don’t know that one!

61. You're thankful that hops are once again plentiful along the state highways.

Doesn’t Miller still get their hops from there?

62. You miss the smell of beer brewing next when you go to Powells.

Try working across the street from both Powell's and Henry Weinhard. I did, on 11th and Burnside, back before it was a furniture store or something. I ate at Rocco’s about three times a week – back when the kitchen was up in the wedge part of the building, before the fire.

63. The words "Harbor Drive" mean anything to you.

Vaguely.

64. You ever said "Don't Californicate Oregon".

See #17.

65. You're sure that you'd love the Oregon Shakespearean Festival, if you'd ever get round to going.

Exactly. Same goes for Crater Lake.

66. You've heard of "Drain, Oregon", and that's just fine. No need to actually visit (no hatin' on Drain, by the way).

Heard of it, never went. Gas prices and all.

67. You know what and where the "D" River is, and think those kids up in Great Falls MT are just a teensy bit uppity. And wrong.

Yes, I’ve been to the “D”. I’ve been to Great Falls, too, and it’s no “D” River.

68. When you go to Newport, whether or not you can visit the Oregon Coast Aquarium, you make sure you stop by the OSU Marine Science Center.

I haven’t been to the Newport Aquarium since before Keiko was there. Maybe I’ve never been. Been to Seaside Aquarium, though.

69. You aren't as impressed by the various bouts of the "town" of Brothers being sold as the outside world is.You, every now and then, use Highway 99E to get to Salem, rather than I-5. Also a pretty drive.

I don’t know anything about that. I do love the 99E drive, though.

70. You know the correct pronunciation of "Gervais"

JERV-us. I hope. That’s what I’ve always said, even before I had heard of Ricky Gervais.

71. You know the difference between "Eola" and "Ecola".

Eola – see Salem; Ecola – see Cannon Beach.

72. You remember when smelt were caught by the bag full every summer.

Nope.

stan said...

Addendum, as I just checked my work a little bit:

Apparently Roundup is a weed killer, not a carpet stain treater. So much for my joke.

I was within 100 feet of Mt. Hood's elevation...11,249, not 11,287...

Samuel John Klein Portlandiensis said...

Dang, Stan, you did good ...

I like your answers, even the ones you got wrong.

I just might post comments on the questions, because it'd be the fair thing to do.